For as long as I can remember I have struggled with my weight. My entire life I have carried around a spare tire. I struggled the most in grade school and it did not help that my name was Faith….Think about it… Fat Faith. This was my nickname for a select few jerkies. I am not trying to paint a sorry for myself picture, I had a great childhood and by the time I hit high school I had lots of friends but I was still chubby.
Skipping a head to today, I am a confident woman with an extremely good looking and loving husband, fantastically funny and bright daughter, successful sales career with wonderful clients, the best family, friends and colleagues a girl could ask for and yes I still have the dreaded spare tire.
About two years ago I had had ENOUGH! It was time to take this weight issue seriously. I was not getting any younger and my family’s heath history insists that I must get slimmer if I wanted to stick around for a while. With that, I started to wean my family off of processed foods (2 years later and my husband is still craving partially hydrated foods), I cook healthier foods and started working out an average of 5 days a week. My heart, mind and soul were reaping the benefits not to mention my health screening numbers showed these life style changes were indeed working. I FELT GREAT!!! I was not supper skinny, but comfortable and happy, in fact my bones were popping out of my back (so I thought). NEVER in my life had my shoulder blades been visible and I was so so happy. I could not wait for my husband to notice…
3 months later (typical man), I said “Honey look my bones are popping out!” My husband was quick to tell me that shoulder blades do not sit on top of the shoulder. I was scared what could it be? It felt like a bone. The next day I went to my primary doc who said it was nothing but a Lipoma and he could send me to a plastic surgeon to remove it. Being cheap and not very vain I passed on the plastic surgeon. Another few months went by and I had a doctor appointment this time with my OB. Since the lump was kinda hurting I brought it up to him and he spent most of the visit fixated on it. He told me he was no expert but he did not believe it was a Lipoma. Lipomas are soft and mushy and this was has hard as a rock. Thanks to my OB that same week I had an appointment with an oncologist, a week later I had a biopsy and fired my primary care doctor. This was the beginning of a new chapter in my life.
I will not bore you again with the entire surgery part of my story (I already did that with my diagnosis post), but I have to share the following before I can continue discussing my spare tire.
Once I recovered from my surgery and had my life back, I got right back on the wagon and continued my workout regimen. While I was feeling good I did start to notice a little bit of pain in my right shoulder but chalked it up to scare tissue.
Enter the ugly black cloud. My next MRI confirmed that the stupid tumor was back. This time my oncologist/surgeon suggested rather than just going back to the operating room we try other treatments. I met with my another doctor on my team who suggested we try Tamoxifen. Tamoxifen has shown to help shrink these tumors. The side effects of this drug included hot flashes, blood clots and possible weight gain. Really weight gain??? I worked so hard to lose the extra pounds and was determined that weight gain was not going to be my fate. I continued to work out (to a modified routine), but after a while I started to notice my muscles and joints were throbbing and hurting and the more I worked out the worse the pain got. I simply could not take the pain and I stopped.
Fast forward 3 months, I am 10 pounds heavier, the Tamoxifen did not work and the tumor grew. And though I gained weight my mind is in a good place.
My new chemo therapy (Gleevec) also has side effects including water retention and a slew of other things but the good news is I am able to walk around the block with no pain. Yeah me!!! I am also working with my pain management nurse who is going to set me up with The Gathering Place a wonderful nonprofit organization in Cleveland, Ohio that offer a slew of services to cancer patients including a gym and trainers.
It’s likely I will spend the rest of my days fighting the battle of the bulge but the truth is I have bigger fish to fry.
xoxo,
Faith